Rod Boyle - SEO
Now I get these emails all the time, promising to help me to optimize my website so I'm highly visible to all the search engines and #1 in search results related to me. I didn't think I was doing so bad, when I search for me I come up #1 for Rod Boyle and #3 for Rod's Blog, but I shouldn't let it go to my head. I can do better.
I mean, it's #1 out of about 1,550,000 results, most of which have nothing to do with me, and if I put quotes about my name I'm #1 out of about 6,580 results, most of which have nothing to do with me but it's still something, although no great shakes.
If I changed my name to something like "Augustus Cervantes Diablo Boyle" I could be the #1 and only, which would be good, but a lot of people would just end up searching for "Augustus Boyle" and I'd be back down in the rankings again, so there's really no point.
What would I want to be #1 at anyways? Maybe "Artist". That would be good, type in Art or Artist or Genius or Writer or Literature or F. Scott Fitzgerald, and have me come in at #1.
Sex would also be good. I'd pay to be the #1 thing people see, think and/or imagine when they search for sex.
But do you know what would be better? I mean, the above, I could work on the site in that direction and sooner or later I might actually get there, but there's something I'm not sure about. What if I wanted to be #1 for the search word "Google"? That would be worth paying for. People search for "Google" and the first thing they see is me. Then I'd know I'd made it. Next time I get an email offering to maximize my site for the keywords I choose I'm going to ask to be #1 for Google and see how much they'll charge.
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- Category: Ideas & Questions
Agoraphobia
Now it's been almost 2 weeks trapped indoors, cold, far too cold to go outside. And I've been running low on supplies, every day the same: coffee, spaghetti, chili peppers, salsa...I'm needing a bit of variety.
Now by cold I mean 30 below, 20 below, why, just 2, 3 days ago we were the second coldest place on the planet, next to Antarctica. Only we don't have the scenery, the cool, the nightlife of Antarctica, it's Calgary after all, and so I would argue that we were colder.
But today there's been a chinook blow in, a balmy 0 degrees Celsius, and I resolve to go outside to replenish supplies. What do I need? Groceries, wine. I look for my snow-blindness goggles, I don't have any, I should make some, it's awfully bright outside. After a few false starts I set off.
To the Chinese grocery first thing. Marvel at the dried fish, dried fish maw, dried cuttlefish, frogs legs, other culinary mysteries and I want to buy some to treat the boy, but it wouldn't be fair, not without the daughter, and so I settle on some pork dumplings. And for some reason I have a craving for Yak-Butter Tea, but that's not something they have. Probably I've been saved from myself.
Then to Safeway, where I finish my limited shopping spree - I'm a pedestrian, after all, and I have to carry this all home. And when I get home I try to encourage the cats to go outside (encourage = pick up, drop outside) but they're not having any of it, faster than I can drop them they're back inside and hiding in the cellar. And I tell them that it's their last chance, maybe for months even, it's as nice as it's going to get, it's not going to get any better than this, but they're having none of it, and so that marks the end of my big day out.
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- Category: Miscellany
Absurdistan - Gary Shteyngart
Highly amusing, but light. Very light. Some of the observations - about "Golly Burton" (Halliburton) are doubtless both damning and true, as are numerous of the observations about Post-Communist Russia and it's various splinter states. But somehow - well, somehow I felt that it lacked an enduring quality. Not a keeper, not one to put on the shelf and reread again at a later date, straight to the bookstore for credit.
I find it hard to believe that it was a "Book of the Year" nominee, but maybe it was a light year.
You can read more about it (spoilers, be warned) at the Wiki here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Absurdistan_%28novel%29
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- Category: Books
Bronze 1943-D Cent
Now the article tells you about the sale of one that was found, but I'm filing this under "Lost" because, really, how many of these bronze or zinc pennies are still out there? Maybe even in your pocket as you read this ...
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- Category: Lost
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