Storebought Valentines - 2011
And it was a long, long Valentines this year. The spirit of Hallmark and commerce infused almost every inch of it - from Saturday night (the early birds) to Monday (the couples) and Tuesday (the "lovers") the entire wheel of human romantic misery and misfortune rolled through the restaurant.
We pack the restaurant these days, bring up tables out of storage, fill every square foot, even the halls beside the bathrooms, with tables. There is barely room enough to stand, let alone move around. We have a set menu, 4 courses at a fixed price, it's necessary to prevent the total collapse of the restaurant. And the tragedy begins.
Some of the people are regulars, the obligatory Valentines night out, we'll leave them alone as we know them already. Then there are the rest, the once-or-twice a year diners "We were here last Valentines Day" they tell us and oddly enough I recognize them, there are the new customers who thought they'd try us out and drink only water, trying to bring some economy to an otherwise expensive meal, there are the couples grown comfortable in their disappointed hopes and ambitions, there are the couples of women - not lesbians, merely thwarted in love.(**For some reason Valentintes is not a very Gay-Friendly commercial holiday, or they have other destinations than our restaurant). There are the triads and quadrilles, couples that share the day with other people or couples. There's a young businessman with his very attractive and seductively dressed consort, they're drinking hard and she's getting a little out of control, making eyes at the waiters, finally, stumbling out the door (him holding it open and waiting for her in disgust) she approaches another table, a couple of girls, and tells them that she wants to join them, go out with them later, she's really not too attached to this man she's with...
There are the proposals, a rude and simple skinhead with his BBW girlfriend, engagement ring upon the table, short with the staff but he's wooing her and she's falling for it, pink cocktails and wine and he's passing his plate (she's still eating) to any server that happens near...
There are the couples that arrive together and leave seperately, she in tears and the boyfriend still waiting for dessert and the bill, Valentines is good for that. There are the couples just getting together, couples in the midst of breaking up, there are the bridges crumbling or slowly being built, there are the women and men stifling yawns and enthusing over trivial gifts of chocolate and flowers, on Tuesday there are the secret trysts between lovers and couples whose love is a well kept secret, it's the day after Valentines and they had other obligations, committments (and a wise choice, as the menu is back to normal and the staff can handle this flow).
And so it passes. G says: "All in all I thought it went pretty well". And it did, so long as you weren't a customer or staff member.
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- Category: Miscellany
DePonzi and Associates
We get lots of business people. The Big Wheels in the city, mostly oil and gas, some technology and support services. People with big expensive cars and even bigger expense accounts. Most of them are regulars, we know them by name or to see them.
And then there are the others, the not so regular, shady business people looking to make a great impression. Reservation under "DePonzi & Associates", they meet with potential investors and hush their voices when the service staff approaches. Still you can overhear fragments before the tone drops - quiet voices promising great fortunes: "Millions of ounces of gold....still underground...limited investment opportunity...", huge returns promised on relatively small capital investments, and their eager guests, starry eyed in anticipation of the great sums they'll make...
It's a classic con, the fine restaurant a front for dodgy dealings, and you wish you could warn them but it's not your job and so you just smile and take their order.
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- Category: People
Bad Manners
He comes in at 1:00 PM. We close, officially, at 2:00, the kitchen's often gone by 1:15 or 1:30.
He's waiting for his date. He doesn't want to sit in the dining room with the rest of the customers, he wants to sit instead in the closed dining room. And once there he gets on his cell phone and begins talking to his date. "She's on her way" he tells me.
He's a new regular, I don't recognize him since I left but one of the other staff members lets me know who he is.
He won't get off his cell phone, but eventually, the third or fourth time I approach the table he tells me that we have a bottle of wine for him in the cooler, the owner knows what it is.
I find it, it's a cheap Orvietto.
We charge him a small corkage, $20.00, it makes it by far the cheapest wine on our menu, or not on our menu as luck would have it.
He continues to talk to his guest on the phone, 1:30, 1:45 and she's still not here. The Owner, the kitchen is open awaiting their order. And the whole time he's on his cell phone.
At 1:55 she arrives and the kitchen gets the order. The last table has left the restaurant, from the other, the "open" side, at about 1:30.
He's out of wine now and gives the waitress $22.00 to run to the liquor store and buy him another bottle of this wine, this $11.00 bottle of Orvietto, and reminds her that the corkage is only $20.00.
They strew their papers and business documents all over the table and stay in the restaurant with his guest until 5:00 PM when we reopen, then decide it's time to leave.
Their waitress, she tells me that he's a new regular of sorts, started coming before Christmas. The owner doesn't know what to think, wants to tell him to come in earlier so he doesn't have to keep the kitchen, keep everyone here all day, I want to tell him it's futile, this customer, he's not unaware that we're closed, he's just possessed of incredibly bad manners.
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- Category: People
Genetic Algorithm Car Evolution Using Box2D Physics (v2.2)
This is quite interesting. An algorithm that "evolves" to discover the best "car" (2D graphic representation) for the terrain that it's driving upon.
What is interesting about this is less the program than the idea that we can somehow create software that evolves with the tastes of the times and the user. Solutions that anticipate problems and "evolve" to overcome them. Programs that can evolve strategies to solve problems in mathematics and physics, like the Big Bang Theory or String Theory, or how to calculate prime numbers...
Link: http://www.boxcar2d.com/
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- Category: Ideas & Questions
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